So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
jump out the window naked night went bad
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