i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Randomize