im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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