if you like me you must not know who I am
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Randomize
