Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
