Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
