how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
