Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Blood and glitter go together right?
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
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