the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize