does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
