Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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