thus making me awesome and them whores
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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