kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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