Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
