it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize
