I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
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