For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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