Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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