she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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