I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Randomize
