I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
