We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Randomize
