i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Randomize
