just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Randomize
