Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Ladies don't puke and tell
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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