Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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