Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Still dying that you shit outside
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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