we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
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