things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
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