SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
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