how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
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