One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
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