They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Four minutes until I can fart!
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize