found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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