I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
