FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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