So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Randomize
