those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize
