Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
birth control should be required to get into college
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Randomize
