We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
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