oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
