I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
