well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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