Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize