I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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