Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
