The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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