this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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