I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
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