I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
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